Wrestling, in particular the WWE, is full of cringe-worthy goodness when it comes to the entertainment aspect of sports entertainment. Christmas-themed segments on Monday Night Raws or pay-per-views are quick to reassure you, the fan over 18, that you are clearly watching a program aimed at children. Sometimes there’s a gem amongst all that coal, but usually they’re bad. They’re so bad, I decided to watch Christmas with the Kranks last night on Netflix, rather than stream another holiday episode of Raw and watch guys like Dean Ambrose and Bray Wyatt go from killing themselves in TLC matches to tumbling over empty, novelty-sized, Christmas presents. Still, I was able to put together this list of other memorable Santa-filled moments.
Tag: WWE Network
Pro Wrestlers vs. Zombies (2014)
In keeping with the theme of Halloween, this was originally going to be posted in October, but I found it difficult to sit through an entire viewing of this movie despite its best efforts to move forward the zombie wrestler movie sub-genre movement. So themed-posts be damned, any month is a good month to watch zombie wrestler movies. Here’s a look at Pro Wrestlers vs. Zombies from the man who brought you Lucifer’s Unholy DesireĀ and Breeding Farm.
The Supernatural Wrestler
What’s wrestling without its larger than life characters? It’s the only medium outside of a comic book where clowns, space travelers, battling cats, and mythical man-beasts can all do battle in the name of good vs. evil. Sometimes those characters are so much more larger than life that they exist outside the parameters that govern the real world, and extend to the great beyond. Or somewhere great beyond adjacent. These paranormal grapplers may call upon the spirit of the dead, live off of human blood for sustenance, worship the devil himself, or just like Bray Wyatt showed us at Hell in a Cell, produce hologram images via possessed lanterns. And as cool or absurd as it might seem at first if it’s at least moderately successful, like all other wrestling gimmicks, it’ll certainly be done to death (Thank you, thank you).
Uncle Grandpa
“History of Wrestling”
Season 2, Episode 5
9/11/2014
A character named Uncle Grandpa immediately draws to mind inbreeding. Luckily, that’s not the case, but he’s definitely out there. Given that the “History of Wrestling” is the extent of which I am able to judge Uncle Grandpa on, I’m going to go out on a limb and also say it’s kind of stupid. But hey, I’m not the intended demographic and I liked Beavis & Butthead growing up, so what the hell do I know? I will say that Uncle Grandpa’s treatment of professional wrestling wasn’t that bad. For a stupid cartoon. So there’s that.
The American Militaristic Wrestler
What better way to honor Memorial Day than to spotlight the brave men who made the seamless transition of protecting our freedom overseas to protecting it in our hometown within the confines of the squared circle? And while Memorial Day honors those who served our country and are no longer with us, I didn’t want to wait until Veterans Day to showcase this particular gimmick. Now, seeing as this is in honor of Memorial Day,Ā thereās no room here for your Gen. Skandor Akbars or Col. DeBeers. This is a look at American militaristic wrestlers. A gimmick that has seemed to fizzle out for the time being. Sure, Cenaās done a good job of trading in his rapping gimmick for the pseudo military thing he adopted after filming The Marine. Like, occasionally switching it up from wearing jorts to camouflage cargo shorts, pushing John Cena dog tags on WWE Shop Zone and, of course, incorporating the military salute into his entrance.
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