Workaholics

Front Yard Wrestling
1/21/2015
Season 5, Episode 2

Based on some research, I found that Workaholics references wrestling A LOT. From Lou Albano costumes to them scrambling to find a place to watch Monday Night Raw. And  Blake’s first showbiz gig was actually doing backyard wrestling on public access TV. But this is the first episode that actually centers on wrestling as the main plot. And they do a hell of a job sending up both pro and backyard wrestling.

The guys find themselves short on cash and behind on the rent. After seeing another co-worker’s public access TV show, Anders has the bright idea of showcasing their own brand of wrestling. But this just isn’t your older brother’s jackass friend’s brand of backyard wrestling, it’s… front yard wrestling. Leave it to these guys to truly reinvent the wheel venue-wise. Everything else is pretty much on par with the wrestling tropes we’ve come to know and love. And that’s what makes Workaholics‘ interpretation of wrestling work, they know which parts of wrestling to highlight that make it great.

Anders becomes the Vince McMahon-type commissioner, with greying hair on the sides and spoiled princess daughter, Bratty Cathy. Blake goes deep into the stereotypical caricature gimmick bag and comes out with Eskimofo. Probably one of the greatest fictional wrestler names ever thought up of. Complete with Inuit-style parka and dead salmon accessory which he promptly bites into upon making his entrance. Adam, on the other hand, opts for a more realistic character adaptation as Adam, which is Adam amped up to 11 and dressed as an Outsider (from the book/movie, not the nWo). And he shills Slim Jims.

Adam and Eskimofo lock up and right away we get a turtle on its back point of view of them calling the next spot and deciding on the fly who the jabroni is going to be. They suplex each other and run the ropes for good measure, but the real drama comes when Bratty Cathy turns on her man, Eskimofo, and channels her inner CZW by blasting him with a fluorescent light tube. Adam makes the cover and becomes the new WWFYWF Inter Rancho World Champion.

The show’s obviously a success and they bump their co-worker Bill’s show from the prime 4 a.m. time slot. Which is perfect for their next major show, RentalMania, headlined by Eskimofo vs. Adam in a ladder match for the belt. Bill snitches on them to their landlord
Del, played by Ben Stiller as Ben Stiller. Del nixes the RentalMania event and threatens to evict them if they go through with it. The guys go through with it anyway, because what would the Workaholics be if they didn’t repeatedly do shit they weren’t supposed to do and drink while doing it.

By the time RentalMania rolls around it seems like the guys have pumped in some of the actual rent money into sprucing up their whole production. An actual ring is set up (generously provided by Santino Bros. Wrestling Academy), guardrails are also in place, even the commissioner, Anders, now has a working microphone instead of an upside down beer bottle to yell, “Let’s get sweaty, and wrestle-uhl-uhllll!” into.

Along with the change in production quality, Adam and Blake have been repackaged with different gimmicks. In true kayfabe fashion, Anders announces that both Adam and Blake have tragically passed away. In their place we get Catam, which is Adam working a Michelle Pfeiffer Catwoman gimmick, complete with Batman Returns backstory; and The Eracist, an eraser of hate and racism via upside down pencils and chalkboard erasers.

Shit gets intense right away with Catam taking the early advantage. Commissioner Anders mentions that the belt is not only up for grabs, but his daughter’s hand in marriage because he is a rich business person, and as we’ve seen in wrestling rich business people can get away with doing anything. ANYTHING. And are never held liable for it.

Del shows up and interferes in the match. Without missing a beat, the trio works over Del, which includes Catam slamming a steel chair against his back. Del no sells the chair shot and lays into them with double clotheslines, suplexes, sleeperholds, and even gives Catam the world’s shortest chokeslam.

“No Sell” Del claims he’s taking their security deposit and evicting them. Then, to add insult to injury, he starts climbing up the ladder to rob them of their Inter Rancho World Championship belt. But the guys regroup and send Del crashing down with a Shield-type of powerbomb off of the ladder and onto a table. Which Del no sells again as he rolls out of the ring within seconds of the powerbomb threatening legal action.

Cut to the guys at home, watching the show, icing their injuries. Then, in a swerve that would bring a tear to Vince Russo’s eye, Del shows up with ice cream from Cold Stone and a smile on his face. He was in on it the whole time!